The Reason I Live is Christ

Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you. (1 Tim 4:16)

Sunday, April 24
When it felt like God is so distant away...

How terrible I'd became in the past few days
I didn't take time to pray, often push it or procrastinate, putting other chores before God, rushing through prayers, afraid others might brand me as too 'religious' if i pray too long. I became self-centered. I didn't listen to the Holy Spirit's promptings. I did not give thanks to God for His grace (esp when He delivers me from much trouble and inconvience and even helped me pass my mission). I forgot my purpose. I lost faith in God....

How it felt like at the last hour of summary exercise
-1 small cake for breakfast (God's providence), lack of energy
-very tired until can faint anytime, lack of sleep for the whole week
-exhausted from all the outfield activities, fire and movement, missions and stuff...
-not right with God
-mental strength let me down
-physical body breaking down, muscle ache, strain on foot result in bit limping, insect bites on hands, minor cuts, heat rash....
-point where tears rolled and inside voice screams....

-=P3ng=- | 8:35 pm

Sunday, April 17
Life Goes On...

Time never fails to move on
A chapter of my life is through
Finished, Closed, Kept in the shelf

Taking it down, Reading it through
How I miss those days that were
But things has to change
Life must go on
No point holding on to the past
No matter how sweet or wonderful they were

Though the past can never return
Memories are here to stay
But thinking about them makes me long for them

Im afraid to think too much
To find myself not willing to let go of the past
Because I might let the present slip by
And regret why I did not live it well

Even though I know this very well
I can't help myself to keep looking back
How i wish time will just stop or never end

But there is a place
Where time never ends
Where eternity knows no end
There's where my future lies
With God in paradise

Till then my heart knows
To tell others is my goal
That everyone that i know
Will share this paradise with me
In time to come...

-GreatAPS

-=P3ng=- | 7:19 pm

The Up-coming Most CoOl event yet! I'm gettin many of my friends to go.. Wanna go? Just msg me!

-=P3ng=- | 6:08 pm

Saturday, April 16

The Alliance - (Grad Nite)

-=P3ng=- | 9:28 pm

The days after A levels... Cool...

-=P3ng=- | 9:24 pm

The Thailand Mission Trip-ers! That time I still had my highlighted hair

-=P3ng=- | 9:23 pm

My class in TJ! 11/03

-=P3ng=- | 9:11 pm

When Life is like Dreaming...

After more than 3 months in NS, life seems like a dream, passing by just like that. It is like you wake up in the morning, it feels as if it was very short, as if it never really happened. I still have the feeling of being plugged in and out of this world, like being thrown back and forth in between 2 worlds... And the feeling is horrible... Like you become lost, confused, and tired of trying to find your way around...

When this phase of my life begins, it feels like the old life can never be brought back. It's hard to even meet up with friends even the limited book out time...

Life in this other world demands differently. Physically and Mentally stressful. Now it seems I have this tired feeling all the time... As if I never really woken up...

Haiz... And so this life goes on...

*A note to readers of my blog, it's kinda sad to abandon my blog or even stop blogging, but i must face up to the fact that I can't blog like before.. So for now posts will be min and only on issues i felt like writing...Till the day I find back time to blog, here's some photos to 'compensate' =p

-=P3ng=- | 8:52 pm

Saturday, April 9

Day Of Passing out from BMT (My section 2 mates!)

-=P3ng=- | 11:35 pm

3rd Week in SISPEC (BLSC)

Monday 4th April 05 0748h
Training Shed behind Echo Coy (Tekong SISPEC)

After a long year break, I'm playing Warcraft 3 again! Yesterday wa playing with my bro one of those custom maps... It has been a long while since I played... Talk about good old times! Haiz, too bad my book out is very short and playing for a short while took away 2 hours of my book out time unknowingly! (the addition is as strong as ever =p)

0945h
Back In Bunk

Was updating my blog yesterday, felt this sense of loneliness... Blogging isn't like before, many of my friends had stopped blogging... no updates etc... My blog also have less ppl visiting (i know it's mainly because I only posted once every few weeks during BMT) My page visits actually dropped from 80 plus to only 20 plus per week! Not that I'm affected by it cos whether got ppl visit or not, comments were very few! =p Actually the reason why I blog so little because I seldom take time to reflect and record my thoughts down nowadays so blogging has somewhat became a chore..

Hmm, changing blog template will now be the top of my to-do-list! This blog feels very dark... Gonna find a nicer one!

*to be cont...

-=P3ng=- | 10:45 pm

Sunday, April 3
When struggles become tough to bear...

Help me O Lord to remember You
To have a faith that will not waver
To know that You have always been there
To be still in Your presence

Lord, the struggles I face
Use it for Your greater purpose
Let no pain or tireness
Draw me away from You

And Lord,
when times get tough
when i cry out to You
please remember me
and hold me safe in Your hands
and help me remember that You are still in control...

Thank God...

-=P3ng=- | 7:59 pm

Week 2 in SISPEC

Tuesday 29 Mar 05 1117h
MPH (Multi-Purpose Hall), SISPEC, Tekong

A New Week In SISPEC... More Than Just Looking Forward To The Next Book Out...

Whether it's BMT, block leave, or just a long Easter weekend, Time has never failed to surprise me at how fast it's moving. After 3 full days of break, here I am back in SISPEC training. Thank God this time I'm back with a clearer mind on the goals I want to achieve. God has been kind to use the Good Friday and Easter Sunday services, cell group lesson, to remind me of Christ's sacrifice, why I'm called by God, my primary purpose and desire --- to testify God's love and grace to others. God reminds me that wherever I go, my identity does not change and so my purpose remains the same...

Wednesday 30 Mar 05 1115h
C4 lecture theater, SISPEC, Tekong

*because time is not within my control, my post is written over a few periods. I'm writing during lectures (partly to keep myself awake), or when there's downtime (like waiting or queueing to practice) So u'll find my post in pieces.

SISPEC Echo coy (company) keeps telling us to set goals, take training positively and to know our purpose here in SISPEC... During a TBTL (team building team learning) session yesterday, we were asked to answer 5 questions:
1. Where am I now?
2. Why am I here?
3. Where do I want to go?
4. How do I get there?
5. Is it in me?
In short, it encompasses the basics of Passion Purpose Drive...

Sunday 3rd April 05 1955h
Home

I guess for myself I've failed to take much time to reflect on such an important issue.. But God has been kind as He guides me along, reminds me through His word.. Yes, I'm now clear of my purpose - To testify God's love to others... and my passion to serve God is how I realy want to do and the drive to do it is knowing this delights God and holding on to His promises of salvation and eternal life with Him...

For this I am confident to say, YES IT IS IN ME!

-=P3ng=- | 7:08 pm