The Reason I Live is Christ

Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you. (1 Tim 4:16)

Sunday, January 30
Remembering God

Hmm, i guess from the last post it's quite obvious that I rushed it... From how unorganised the thoughts were and some of them are not expressed correctly... This time isn't going to be any different simply because there's too many stuff I wanna do in such a short time...

The past week had been better for me... After being more used to the environment, things become better... But when the going gets tough, it gets very easy to lose sight of God...

haiz.. no time again.. Ok, I promise the next time i come back, I'll put blogging as my 1st priority.. That's next next tue... Till then.. God bless...

*pray for the coming week... It's my field camp... Pray that God will keep me in good health through it.. that I do not fall sick or sustain any injuries.. Thx.. God bless

-=P3ng=- | 6:13 pm

Sunday, January 23

A New Look, A New Phase in Life...

-=P3ng=- | 5:22 pm

Saturday, January 22
First 2 weeks in Tekong...

*the 1st part of this reflection was written on the mrt Sitting in the MRT in my usual casual & comfy attire with my fav deuter bag on my lap, I'm on my way to visit my 3rd Aunt clinic at Lakeside. It seems like any other days, except this time the reflections on the train's windows shows a kid with extremely short hair rather than the long and highlight hair...

A simple glance would have made it seemed like a dream, as if I was taken away to another world for 2 weeks and finding a need to catch up with that 2 weeks when i returned. (the YCG in BLC has undergone big changes when i was away... Now it's called Salt & Pepper Youth or S.P.Y. in short) However, this dream isn't something one will look forward to return to. I definitely dread going back there this coming Sunday evening.

Coming out after the 2 weeks showed me that my views and perceptions towards many things changed and matured in some ways. One thing is for sure is that I see much value in the simple things I've taken for granted. I thank God that I've grown. I was flipping through the journals I wrote during the Thailand Mission trip and I saw a really different person. Reading them brings back much memories and even though it's only been like less than 2 months, I miss the trip a lot already. It became something so precious all of a sudden...

Life in the army isn't exactly very tough or inhumane in any way. I must thank God that He has helped me to prepare for this. I realized I had many backgrounds and basics to rely on. St John Ambulance helped me with the regimentation/ drills/ uniform aspect/ and it definitely helped me when I was the Platoon I/C. Outdoor Activities helped me with the physical aspect, with a stronger drained mental strength and better stamina allowed me to stay strong and encourage others during tekan sessions...

The main struggle I faced over the 2 weeks was mainly spiritual. Being an easily influenced person, I find myself being of energy trying to fight off all the bad influences like vulgarities and lying. Not reading God's word and neglecting God made it worse. There were times when I felt so terrible, and cried as if I felt the Holy Spirit's grief. Then, God showed me that I had a wrong mindset. That my relationship with God is built based on my knowledge of Him and how He revealed Himself to me rather than the influence around me. I need not worry where God send me to for what others say or do will not affect that close relationship I have. I keep praying that the Holy Spirit will lead my thoughts so that I do not have the wrong priorities or put the tasks I have to do above God. I also prayed that God would cleanse my lips, that I will not get influenced sub-consciously by all the vulgarities, so that my lips will only be used to encourage and testify.

Honesty is an issue for me. I can see myself lying trying to get away from punishments and each time after I lie, I ask myself if what I’ve gain from that lie is really of value to me. Thank God that each time God revealed my sin and “scolded” me appropriately and forgave me.

After praying that I may be focused in God’s purpose of me being there, I begin make use of every opportunity that God has provided to build rapport with my other platoon mates. There was once where we were waiting outside the platoon office because we did smth wrong, then I began talking to a guy beside me and I managed to reach into the topic on religion and how he feels. There was also another time where somehow in my section (room of 12 beds) we had a discussion on the various religions… I thank God for all these opportunities…

Basically, this is only the 1st 2 weeks.. There is much more to come.. Thank God for this long weekend rest… Now it’s time to book-in!

Continue to pray for me, that I’ll stay strong in the Lord, that my Christians friends in my platoon will remain in the Lord. Pray also that God will grant opportunities for His word to go forth even in places like the army.

*sorry the post isn't very well planned or well written... In a rush now... So i just wrote anything that comes into my head.. =p

-=P3ng=- | 11:17 am

Friday, January 7
Don't worry, Be Happy!

Be anxious for nothing..
1. For our names are already secured in the book of life...and so we'll be going to heaven for eternity..

2. Because God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)

3. For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)

4. for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. (Philippians 2:13)

Now what do we do if we don't have to be anxious... that's right... we rejoice! Praise God for what Christ has done that we now can rejoice in the Lord...!

-=P3ng=- | 8:54 am

Tuesday, January 4
A Look Back At the Holidays...

When people ask me how are you or how's the holidays.. My reply is it was wonderful and meaningful... Thank God for He has answered my prayer when I asked that Him to help me make sure this holiday will be well-spent...

26/11 - 5/12 Thailand Mission Trip
6/12 Grad Nite
8/12 - 10/12 Class Chalet
13/12 - 22/12 Preparation & Rehearsals
15/12 OAC's Junior Treat Senior
19/12 Performance at Orchard Road
23/12 The Different Christmas
24/12 Candlelight Service
25/12 Christmas family fellowship
26/12 Christmas Service/ Lunch
27/12 YCG Retreat
28/12 - 29/12 AdJam 04
31/12 Thanksgiving fellowship/ Stayover at Wei Yang's house

Now you know why whenever you ask me I keep saying I'm busy.. I'm thankful for that.. But the downside is I can't go for everything that comes along.. I missed a few class outings, limited time with family.. But thank God that in the end it was worth it all..

With the time left, I'm now resting and preparing for NS... hehe but getting boring le.. =p

-=P3ng=- | 7:36 pm

More than tryin' to make it through another day...

I've found answers, fonud what's more to this life than just living and dying...
I've filled this emptiness within me and found life's true meaning, found the reason to live, found something to hope for.
I've found Someone real...
...Have you?
Or are you still sticking with the crowd, saying "Life just goes on..."
The answers are always in front of you...

Take it from a guy who has searched for 3 years and found it:
Though the search is mentally taxing and painful,
it's better than being left in the dark for the rest of your life.
Take courage to admit that emptiness,
Be Bold to search for and hear the truth!

Clay Aiken - More To This Life

Today I watched in silence
As people passed me by
And I strained to see if there was something
Hidden in their eyes
But they all looked back at me as if to say,
"Life just goes on..."

The old familiar story
Told in different ways,
"Make the most of your own journey
From the cradle to the grave
Dream your dreams tomorrow
Because today
Life must go on..."

Oh, and there's more to this life
Than living and dying
More than just trying to make it through the day
More to this life
More than these eyes alone can see
And there's more
Than this life alone for me

He takes care of his family
He takes care of his work
And every Sunday morning
He takes his place at the church
But sometimes he still feels the need to search
"Life just goes on..."

At night he lies in silence
Staring into space
Looks for ways to make tomorrow
Better than today
But in the morning light
He looks to say,
"Life must go on..."

Oh, and there's more to this life
Than living and dying
More than just trying to make it through the day
More to this life
More than these eyes alone can see
And there's more
Than this life alone for me

Where do we start
To find every part
Of what makes this life complete?
If we turn our eyes
To Jesus we'll find
Life's true beginning
Is there at the cross
Where he died
Where he died

To Bring Us
More to this life
Than living and dying
More than just trying to make it through the day
More to this life
More than these eyes alone can see

And there's more
To this life
Than living and dying
More than just trying to make it through the day
More to this life
More than these eyes alone can see
And there's more than this life alone can be

More to this life
More than livin' and dyin'
More than tryin' to make it
Through another day...

This will be something I'll leave this blog with as I enlist in National Service. Though I will no longer be there to testify to you how real is God and His love, I'll pray that God will help you open up your heart to see beyond the material world...
God Bless my friends in class 11/03, friends in Outdoor Activity Club, friends in St John, special friends and above all my beloved family...

-=P3ng=- | 9:44 am

Monday, January 3
A Year Ago....A Year Later

A Year Ago... I wrote this

Have you ever wondered what is the purpose of living?
Why are you here?
What must you do before you die?
Or do you just wait for death?

If we were to do Good, how do we define it?
Who is to judge what is right or wrong?
Even if so, is there any thing that is totally good?
Isn't everything balanced in this world?
When there is Good, there'll be Evil;
When there is Light, there'll be Shadow;
When there is Peace, War will break out;
When something happens, it'll do both good and bad - depending on your perspective.
If so, do we still do Good if it brings bad too?
But wait, doing nothing brings harm too,
Doesn’t it?

Is Perfection the answer then?
To strive for the highest standard,
To achieve the best technology;
To understand everything,
To explore the ends of the universe,
To achieve the best Society, the best grades, the best job, the most possession?
Or to be the Best person in the world?

We're a flawed race,
There is no doubt about it.
Many said No one is Perfect,
So why do so many people blind themselves from this truth,
And try to attain Perfection if it is impossible?

Perhaps it is to be Happy?
But what does one gain from this feeling?
What does it bring about?
Isn't it only an illusionary concept since it is only momentary?
Isn't it no different from sadness and anger?
If so, why do people still find contention in this illusion?
Isn't it all just plain emptiness in the end?

Some of us work so hard to stay alive,
Only finding death come to us all.

Some of us get so attached to the things around us,
Till the point we're lost and controlled by it;
You may say how is it possible,
But what about Relationship, Fame or Money.
Some even think those were everything on this earth.

Some of us live in Cages,
Trapped by other people's opinions,
Forced to do what others want,
Lived a life as a “slave” unknowingly without free will.
Of course,
You'll say again I'm exaggerating.
Then ask yourself,
Have you ever feel bad when others do not accept you?
Have you ever do things that you hate just to please your friends?
Can you say all of your actions were your own free will?
Totally not influenced by what others might think?
What about the way you dress,
The way you behave,
Or the things you like?

But of all questions,
What do I do if I find my purpose in Life?
Do I fulfill it without a doubt?
Will I then find my answer?
Will I then find the true meaning of Life?
What if I do not wish to fulfill it?
What will happen then?

Of all my questions I can only answer;
What is the purpose of writing this?
It is to let more people to be aware;
To seek answers,
And hopefully clarify my doubts.

What is your current purpose?
Stop whatever you are doing,
Let everything go,
All your worries and stress.
Empty your mind
And ponder the above,
State your views and reply if you can.

All are welcome.
-GreatAPS

A Year Later...
I've found my answers...

Identity - I'm created by God

Purpose - Initially, it was to enjoy all that God has created for Man. But because of sin, it changed a bit to simply Trust and Obey God.

Direction - Living my life testifying God's love, following God's will, walking with God until the day I meet Him in heaven

Judge - All things whether visible or invisible are judged by God. It's God's absolute standards and He does not compromise. Good or Bad is according to God and that has been written down

Faith - My ability to believe all these comes from God. The more I seek Him, the more I know Him, the more real He becomes. And this purpose I will not forsake knowing that this is the truth which I've been searching for about 3 years.

Sacrifice - Knowing the truth, understanding reality, even though it has only been a year, time is not required to test the truth. A year ago I'm still searching, still into postive thinking. A year later, I proclaiming God's gospel on streets in Bedok and Tampines, going on Mission trips for God and willing to lay down my life if the need arises.. This is the power of God..

-=P3ng=- | 8:40 am

Preparing to go to School...?

Yes, I'm going back to school... This special school starts only this fri... You have to take a special bus at Pasir Ris interchange where it'll take you far away... (Kinda like Hogwarts eh? =p)

That wonderful school is overseas.. Ok, I'll have to take a boat... The name is called BMTC school 1, or Basic Military Training Centre... It's a school! Geez... =p How fun arh? I'm staying at their 'hostel'! and there's extra PE lessons and a complusory outdoor activities CCA... how cool... =p Can't wait to go in... (right....)

-=P3ng=- | 8:32 am

Saturday, January 1
Experiences with Relationship

It's a challenge to tackle this post with maturity because I'm still seeking what relationship really means... Through my JC life, I've met a princess and an angel. Doesn't matter what has happened, I'm just thankful that while things didn't work out, I've gained 2 very wonderful friends... After realising that people wait as long as 6 years for their partners while trusting that God has His own plan, I now fully understand why they keep saying such things cannot be forced.. But like what I've mentioned before, it's a struggle by itself. Because the sinful nature stirs desires and longing and even negative thoughts, thinking that it's because I'm not good enough etc... It's made worse when friends of the same age found their partners leading to envious feelings... That's human... sad but undeniable... I'm no exception but I learnt that in this part of life, I should also seek God to guide and help to exculde myself from sinful thoughts and be focused on God's work...

To Princess and -=Angel=- I've met, thanks for being part of my life =)
May God bless you in all you do and be with you through all trials in life

-=P3ng=- | 10:27 pm

Thanksgiving and Prayer

A 2004 ends, it's always worth the time to stop, look back and thank God for the past year. For me, the past year has indeed been very wonderful. Like what I've shared during the thanksgiving, the past year has been a miracle, just as how I come to accept Christ. Looking back, I can so clearly see how God has guided, shaped, and led me through. With trials, difficulties, and troubled times, God helped me to grow and depend on Him. The more I depend on Him, the more I come to know Him, the more real He becomes to me. In response to that, the more willing I am to serve Him. God is kind and real, not just any religion or belief. I known Him personally and tell you that He is as real as the joy I've within me.

Aout the weather lately... If u have noticed, the weather has been cold and rainy since Monday. While many of us complain about it, that's it's so cold, just a few hours of flight time away, the rain is causing more problems that we can even imagine. The rotting of cropse, the hinderance caused by the rain in transporting the supplies and aid, the dampening of the mood.. It is really horrible... I urge you to pray for the rescue work and the victims.. May God's mercy be upon them... Amen

-=P3ng=- | 8:48 pm

Reflections on Adjam

Besides the physical challenge and the experience, there's something else that is interesting...
The competition was open only to all ODAC members.. And it's cool in a sense that most of these people had skills and leadership characters... During times like when the 14 teams are spilt into 2 big groups to build rafts, it kinda cool seeing people taking initiative to round up the teams and lead, give comments and work togther... Haha, still remember when we started tying, we were like Ok, 2 people to each square lash... Everyone knew basic campcraft.. don't find that anywhere...

-=P3ng=- | 3:35 am